The Good. The Bad. The GREAT!!!

THE GOOD: Davie and I took a much needed trip out to Nana and Papa's lakehouse on Thursday. Before we left we met Daddy at the zoo and it was so fun to see her finally enjoying something besides her feet as she walked around. She stayed busy at the lake walking and walking and walking, swinging, sliding, and swimming in the hot tub. She also slipped under water a few times and thought it was the funniest thing ever. The next day we had planned to see the Sanders family in Broken Arrow and then on to my sister's birthday celebration.

THE BAD: Davie started getting fussier and more lethargic as the weekend continued. Then we heard about the weather. We DID however get to spend some time with Jennie's little family and my sister's little family before we had to ship back out towards OKC. This morning Davie had a full-fledged temperature, so we hit the road. It got worse and worse on the turnpike until I was thinking that it will be a miracle if I get home without getting in a wreck. That's not a good feeling with your sick baby girl in the back seat. Davie started crying and I was getting stressed to the max and distracted, so I decided to pull over and deal with her . . . to be safe. Oddly enough, my attempt to be "safe" wound me up down in a ditch. I fought back tears as I got out and tried shoving stuff under the wheel to get traction. Some classy dude yelled "a**hole!" at me as he drove by on the other side of the turnpike. I actually started laughing at this point, because WHO DOES THAT?! Anyways, a cop came by and told me to get back in the car and he would put me in the system but he said it would be awhile before someone could get to me. I got back in the car and looked at Davie and the tears were really pushing in. Then Steven called. I hadn't wanted to worry him if I could handle it myself, but of course I told him what happened. He got our friend Chris and his Jeep and they started out my direction. I called AAA because I remembered my dad getting me a membership awhile back, but it had since been canceled so they couldn't do anything for me. Anyways, within an hour, the Bristow Wrecking Service came by and took care of me. He was the nicest guy ever, and I didn't even mind paying him $100 . . . I wanted out of there before I had an all-out panic attack.

THE GREAT!: I met Steven and Chris at the McDonalds in Stroud and my darling husband drove me the rest of the way home. When we got home Davie was running 102 temperature, so we gave her some Tylenol and let her rest and then gave her a bath. Now she is running around like a crazy person instead of draping herself over the nearest leg. We came home and had Chili-fest 2010 and are happy to be warm and together. We also got a Wii . . . just for icing on the cake. I can't explain how good it is to be in the same house as my husband and my child at the same time.

Reality Cookies

My side hurts from laughing. My sister Kristen came over to eat Chinese with me tonight at my grandma's. She opened up a fortune cookie that said, "Keep your feet on the ground even though friends flatter you." We laughed at how NOT uplifting that was. "When people say nice things about you, don't believe them. They're not true." Hahaha. So then we thought what a funny idea it would be to have "Reality Cookies" instead of Fortune Cookies. We started to come up with one or two ideas, and before you know it we couldn't write fast enough. It was strange how easy it was, haha. The only thing that would've made it better is if my other sister Kacey had been there. No doubt she would've come up with some truly hilarious realities.

What's your reality?

You are about to meet a perfectly average person.

Stop trying. It's over.

Something mundane is ahead.

Something you lost will stay lost.

The night is dark. Count on it.

You will find new outlets for creative ability. Sadly, you have none.

It's too late.

Not that shirt. Seriously, it's too small.

You are about to meet someone who will hurt you horribly, but you won't know until it's too late.

One of your friends is talking bad about you right now.

The path ahead will end when you die.

Ask for fame, riches, and fortune. Go on, ask.

A secret admirer will soon creep you out.

Some say a warm smile is testimony of a generous nature, but remember babies fart-smile.

If you continually give, people will start to call you a doormat behind your back.

If you set your goals too high, you won't reach them.

You will soon be invited to a 7 year olds birthday party.

You will spend old age in incredible boredom.

You will meet a short, fair, average acquaintance.

Love and laughter is great medicine . . . also, Zoloft.

Love is like wildflowers. It is often found in the most unlikely places . . . also, it dies.

None of the secrets of success will work if you are a loser.

The first step to better times is to go on a diet.

It doesn't matter.

The secret of getting ahead is cheating.

Your past success will be overshadowed by someone else's success . . . in bed.

You are very expressive in words, act, and feelings . . . and people hate that about you.

You should be able to undertake and complete anything, but you never do.

You're okay. Everyone thinks so.

20 months and we're finally hearing some thoughts . . .

Davie is talking up a storm. I think it is really a mixture of our ears being trained to her voice, and her voice training itself to sound more like ours. I also think the biggest difference that I noticed over the weekend is that she actually wants to repeat and answer us. She says some basics and then some. I wanted to list a few of my faves though.

"Mama" - I've been waiting a long time for this. I seriously just heard this for myself last week. Steven swore she said it one morning when I wasn't home, but he might've been just trying to keep my hopes afloat since she says "dada" like it's going out of style. But oh my, when she says "mama" and she really means "mama" . . . there are no words.

"DAAAAA-DAA?" - It is so adorable to hear Davie yell inquisitively for Steven. She does it all the time. Whether he's in the other room, or at work, or on the phone - heartmelting.

"Day-doo." - This means "thank you" and I will argue that it was her first meaningful words. Now I chalk that up to good parenting, eh?!

"Thkow!" - This means "Scout" . . . I hear this anytime we are outside. She thinks Scout should be there.

"Oh Boy!" - It is as clear as a bell. You have never heard anything cuter. Her teeny tiny voice perks up when she sees something interesting. She said it probably 15 times today, maybe more.

Wow. When it rains it pours - in a great way. It feels like certain parts of their development creep along, and then over the course of a month or two (or sometimes a weekend), they blossom!

BIG NEWS

I have to apologize for faking you out with the title here. Mainly I haven't written because I've had no "big news" among everyone else's "big news". I have loved reading about pregnancies and babies and new jobs and on and on. For now, I'm not really experiencing any giant changes . . . for once in my life. It's kind of nice. I think the nice part is not always looking for what's next. I am satisfied with our little life right now.

Steven has a job that he works really hard at . . . but they show him the appreciation he deserves, which is what I always wanted for him in his career. He really enjoys it, although he could do with less hours - but that is a problem we can deal with for now in a time where so many people are looking for work. He also is working a lot of weekends out in the wilderness. We have tried out a few different options for spending time together, but it's been rough.

Davie is indescribable. She is, as always, delightful and hilarious and learning every day. She loves talking about her daddy when he is away, and laughing at him when he is here. It is funny to see her little personality developing. She loves everyone she has ever met (much like her momma), and she gets so involved in her "tasks" that she can't even hear people talking to her (much like her daddy). She does look so much like me, but when she is busy working on something, she looks just like Steven.

I am beyond grateful for what life looks for us right now. I was able to take 9 hours this semester, and I adore all my classes. I am spending more time than ever working with my grandma. She and Davie get a long splendidly, and I am so thankful for all the conversations I've gotten to have with her in the last 6 months that I've been able to work there. We have re-arranged the schedule quite a few times now to try to accommodate for some quality family time with Steven. I think we've finally figured it out. Davie and I are going to suck it up and go out with Steven on the weekends as much as possible. This should be interesting, but part of me is really excited. I hope the weather holds good things for us.

So, no - I am not pregnant. I didn't get a new house. I didn't get a new car. I'm not looking at doing any of those things in the near future. But I am content. We are making things work for us. I am happy, and that is the best kind of news.

My biz-nass.

My mom's brother died when I was in 8th grade of a drug overdose. Honestly, I don't remember many details about him. Of course I remember HIM, I just didn't know him that well. Still it was a shock. He had lived most of his life doing drugs, blowing money, and such things. Interesting because he led a fairly normal life from the outside. He had a lovely wife, and two better kids you couldn't ask for. He had a close extended family, even working for his own father most of his life. Since he died without me knowing him very personally, I kind of wrote him off as one of those no-good druggies.

Just the other day my mom mentioned how he used to send her flowers on all kinds of holidays. He'd always send her something for Mother's Day . . . because after all, she was a mother, just not his. She said he was very sweet and thoughtful. I'd never thought of him that way. I just shaped him in my head as a rascal . . . which he was in part I'm sure.

Growing up is weird. It really is like the more I learn the less I know. I'm less sure about anything, except that before I just had my head in the clouds, or in the sand, or up another dark place we won't call by name.

There are people so close to me that I remember a certain way, only to find out they struggle with something I would have never pinned on them in a million years. I am learning so much in my developmental psychology class. I really feel after every chapter like my head will explode with knowledge that I just can't make true sense of. There is so many contradicting ideas that I believe. Anyways, I guess my life right now and what I am reading are crashing together and I'm trying to connect it all.

What makes a person? Are they summed up by their thoughts and intentions . . . or their words . . . or their actions and behaviors? I know that it is a mixture - all and none of it. You can describe someone's character without mentioning all of their sins. I think before I was able to not think about it because what difference does it make. Now I am trying to decide how I am going to help people, and it makes a HUGE difference.

My professor says it's a good sign to be in this state of disequilibrium . . . but I'm ready to be undisequilibriumized.

Tradition.

Having a child makes you long for traditions with them, something special, something that she will look forward to every year. This Valentine's Day is Davie's first one as a little girl, not a teeny tiny infant. I know she will not remember this specific day, but we will. I've been thinking about it and I decided as Davie's mom, I wanted to get her a thoughtful gift to let her know how special she is (and to teach her how to receive gifts gracefully). Also as her mom, I wanted Davie to have a special date with her dad for Valentine's Day. He will teach her what to expect from any fellow who wishes to take her on an outing. If I know Steven there will be many non-Valentine's dates like this, but this will be something very specific for her to look forward to each year. An added bonus (and one I definitely calculated into the mix) is while they are out on the town I will be enjoying some much needed ME time.

I'm not a fan of "exlusivisity" among mothers, but I will say this - I just don't think you can really appreciate personal time until you have a dependent.

Steven has been working so extremely hard and so extremely much lately. I am so proud of him for making the most of this opportunity, but we sure miss him being around. Davie has become a bit of a momma's girl from the amount of time we spend together. But tonight, Steven came and got Davie from my grandma's house and he took her home with him. He just called me and said he had the sweetest time as a father that he thinks he's had so far. Something as simple as Davie just sitting with him in the big chair for 30 minutes, hugging and cuddling on him until she finally fell asleep in his arms . . . I thought she was incapable of falling asleep with another human being in the room. It proves the comfort she feels when she's with her daddy.

I love being a part of Steven's team. That's what it's all about after all.

Dissing your disease.

Strep, my old colleague! How like you to drop in when I have business to attend to.

Remember 5 years ago when I was fresh out of college, a naive little immune system plummeting into a cess pool of snot and cooties, a cess pool called third grade. You joined me on a regular basis, nearly every month, requiring every single one of my allotted sick AND personal days. Remember that? That was fun.

I guess it was high time you come back for a visit. After 5 years of building a fortress of an immune system in the trenches of public school, I have taken a break. The defenses have gotten lazy. I especially respect your irreverent timing. I mean, having me vomit all night while I am responsible for an elderly lady and a toddler - classy, Strep, really classy.

You couldn't have let me get more than two hours of sleep that night, could you? Too merciful? Right. The bouts of chills and fevers were a nice touch too. Oh and who could forget the way my tonsils crash together when I sneeze! It's also really fun how it sounds like I'm very quiet and far away . . . because the boils on my tonsils are so thick, my voice has to find it's way to squeeze around my uvula.

Anyways, I just wanted to give you a quick "shout out" and say THANKS A MILLION for coming the week of my first grad school test and also the week before a singing gig. Again - your timing is impeccable.

Keep it real, Strep.