Saturday, February 12, 2011

You Can't Tell Me You'd Turn That Down!

Imagine this . . .

You LOVE to read. To get wrapped up in another world, another life. Maybe it's in order to take a break from what is going on in your life . . . or maybe it is in order to help you sort through what is going on in your world. Anyhow, you love to read.

Now imagine this . . .

One day you are visited by a fairy godmother. She says she has been watching over you for some time, and she wants to give you a very personal gift. From behind her back she pulls a magical book. You ask what book it is. She says, "It is any book you like." You open it up and say "Gone With The Wind" . . . and soon the pages are filled with the life of Scarlet O'Hara. You say "The Hunger Games" . . . and soon you are reading about Katniss Everdeen in the arena. You say "Little Women" . . . and soon you are whisked into the budding relationships of four sisters and their Marmee.

Your fairy godmother says, "You may take this wherever you like. Whenever you need to find solace or enlightenment in the words that others have written, open this book."

You ask, "This is too good to be true. Surely there is some sacrifice I must make in order to have this gift."

She waves her wand, and the beautiful book turns into a flat, black panel. "It still works the same way, just without the beauty and sensation of a page. It's the same words, same story. Do you still want this gift?"

........ You can't tell me you'd turn that down!

It's funny to me that people can be so snobby about eReaders. I found out that J.K. Rowling has all but forbidden her books to ever be released on an eReader. Why? They are on audiobook and major motion pictures. An eReader shows the same words, the same story . . . it encourages people to READ. I love reading a paper book as much as the next guy. But I really love being able to toss my light little Kindle in my purse and whip it out in the doctor's office. I like that on roadtrips, Steven and I can have both of our books on one device and pass it back and forth between driving shifts. I like that since I pack a suitcase twice a week to go to and from my grandma's house, I don't have to worry about finishing up a book and not having another one ready to go. I'm paying for these books, and therefore still supporting the author. I don't see the big deal. I understand that people have personal preferences. If you would rather hold a paper book than a piece of plastic, I don't judge. But I'm just having a hard time understanding this author's decision.


Kinsey said...

I have to admit though, that I dream of having a big library in my house filled with my favorite books and a cozy chair . . . like my sister's.

Kristen the Sister Who Knows Everything said...

My fairy godmother and your fairy godmother
Sitting by the fire
My godmother says to your godmother
"I'm gonna set your plastic book on fire"

Talkin' 'bout
Hey now
Hey now
Iko iko an nay
Jockomo feena ah na nay
Jockomo feena nay

Kristen the Sister Who Knows Everything said...

Hey- I've been wanting to reread Gone With the Wind. Can you loan me your copy?

Oh...I guess not.

Do you read with your e-reader in the bath?

What do you do when your e-reader malfunctions/breaks/runs out of battery?

How much do you want your daughter to handle your e-reader? How much do you have to worry that she might break it?

What if you ended up stranded on a desert island? Would you want your e-reader or would you want some books with real pages?

Don't you miss being about to underline and write in the margins?

In 400 years when the anthropologists are trying to figure out our culture, my books are going to be a lot easier for them to figure out than your e-reader.

You would have to have ten e-readers to stack on your head while you balance them in order to improve your posture, but you only need 3 or 4 books.

What will you use when you need to prop up one end of the bed? Or fix a wobbly table? You gonna put your e-reader under those legs?

Hmmm. I was just about to go through Harper's books and pick out some really bright, beautiful, imaginative ones for Davie...but since you are so committed to e-readers...

Finally, and most importantly:

Wouldn't you rather use a hardback book to slap me across face than an e-reader? Your e-reader would break, and the hardback would hurt much more.

Just food for thought.

Amanda Fortney said...

you guys crack me up!

Kinsey said...

Dear Superior Hag,

What would your fairy godmother bring you? Some pages that smell like new books? I hope you and your sense of smell are very happy on your desert island.

Now to answer your questions. Yes, I can loan you my paper copy of Gone With The Wind. It's one of my favorites so I have a hard copy.

I do read with my Kindle in the bath. I have a little table that goes across with a little stand for books. I like that I can just press a little button with a damp finger, instead of getting the pages all soggy and wavy.

When my Kindle's screen messed up, I busted out Lord of the Rings hard copy, and Kindle sent me a new one. Plus, I have all my purchases saved online.

I don't want Davie to TOUCH the Kindle. It's not made for kids. I take Davie to the library every Wednesday for story time and we bring our big bucket to switch out books. We read every night, and many times during the day.

If stranded on a desert island, both could be equally useful. I could burn your pages to make fire. Or I can jimmy with the Kindle in order to make a transmitter that will get us rescued . . . so I'm not going to acknowledge that any further.

I can underline, highlight, and write notes on the Kindle. But what I like better than that is being able to scan up to a word I don't know and without leaving the page, I can know the meaning of a word in 1 second.

The 400 years thing is also too weird to acknowledge.

I don't need to improve my posture, because my Kindle only weighs 10 ounces, compared to your scoliosis causing 25 pounds of crisp, clean pages.

I respect books too much to use them as props for beds and tables.

Although I might have an extra copy of your poetry laying around ... ZING!!!

I would rather slap you with the back of my hand, to answer your question.

Now enough of this Team Edward/Team Jacob crap! I see a place for both, but then again I am tolerant of differences.

Superior Hag said...

1. You win, but only because your argument makes sense and not because you changed my mind.

2. I am always to weird to acknowledge, but am honored that you chose to do so anyhow.

3. Always burn my poetry first. Please.

4. My fairy godmother is still going to set yours on fire. You can't say you weren't warned.

Kinsey said...

Haha. I love you . . . and I tolerate your superiority, because you truly are superior. You would make a wise and merciful queen. You are what I aspire to. I hope you know that.

Kristen (Superior Hag, etc, etc) said...

Oh sissie, don't aspire to me, but remember I worship you.