I started to feel faint, literally. My heart beat fast, my face got warm, and I started to feel pretty ill. Then I turned around and looked at my baby sleeping in the back seat. Panic attack avoided. I love her so much.
What's strange is she doesn't DO anything for me. She (most likely) doesn't have the capacity to "love" me back. But I love her. It is the most selfless love I have for her . . . and this may be my only chance to experience that from this point of view (as love-er, instead of love-ee). One day, hopefully, she will love me as her mother. But for now, it's my honor to love her and take care of her.